Pizza and wine

Its been a long day.

The piles of washing are adding up and I'm feeling a bit off at the moment. I hope I'm not coming down with something... :(

What does balance and moderation mean to you?

Today the question was asked.... "What does moderation mean to you?"

I do like to use the term 'balance' instead of moderation.

But this is what I came up with....

Moderation/balance to me means being able to go out to dinner and order whatever appeals to me on the menu. Without fear, without guilt, without angst.

It means sometimes eating everything on the plate and other times asking for a doggy-bag to take some home (or just leaving it unfinished).

It means baking a cake the old fashioned way without worrying about it being 'clean' or 'raw' or 'healthy' (or 'super'). Having the amount of it I want and being satisfied because I didn't restrict myself.

Moderation/balance also means knowing that no food is off-limits unless we have allergies/intolerances... and it also means I have the freedom to work around those in whatever way I can - dairy-free margarine anyone?

It means I can say 'yes' to a food being offered that I really want. And 'no' when I just don't feel like it.

To me, moderation/balance = freedom.

And it means I can live my life.

Parent/teacher interviews

Two hours of parent/teacher interviews.

Two hours.

I shouldn't complain, some parents were there for longer and the poor teachers were there from end of school to after 8.30pm.

And being the mean mother I am, I made my kids sit outside and do homework and eat dinner (packed in the Thermos, thank you very much - sometimes I am organised lol) while we saw my daughter's teachers.

But I'm not doing that again unless it's requested. And apparently I have a model student for a child. Something must've happened between Grade 6 & 7 ;)

Trust the process

I've been lifting weights for about 2.5 years now. I started small and have slowly been plugging along gradually getting stronger.

I've been following the ‪New Rules of Lifting Supercharged program for the last little while and am on my second go through. I enjoy it, it challenges me and it gives me a way to see definite progress by looking back through my training logs.

This morning I wanted to see where I was in relation to this stage last time. I've just started Hypertrophy III for those that know the layout.

It's a 3x10 squat day today. Last time I was squatting 26kg/57lb (65% bodyweight). This morning I did a fairly comfortable 36kg/79lb for a 3x10. That's 90% of my bodyweight.

I know it doesn't seem huge, but it's a 10kg increase over 12 months-ish which is 25% of my bodyweight added to that bar on my back.

So that's kinda a big deal for me :)

It hasn't been a steady upwards increase. It's been up, down and sideways, and more like a gentle crawl. Which is fine by me.

Don't get caught up in the 'must lift more weight asap' mindset. If you're in this as a lifetime thing, it's not necessary. Trust the process - you WILL get stronger. In your own way and in your own time.

I listen to my body, focus on form and increase the weight when I'm ready. And I de-load when I need to.

Slow, steady and sustainable. Little things adding up over time. And it's a pretty amazing journey.

Messed up week

I can foresee this being a slightly messed up week.

I have to keep checking the date on my watch to know what day it is...

And footy training is tonight instead of Thursday.

Let's not forget there's another long weekend coming up this weekend.

I need a real holiday.

Food, fun and friends

We didn't make it to the Dawn Service this morning like we have the last few years. After a big weekend it was better for us to stay in bed and watch the Anzac Day commemorations on tv instead.

I made a double batch of Anzac bikkies and we had some friends over for food and fun - a nice bbq lunch and just a good time really. Even if we spent some of the time trying not to watch the kids trying out the boy child's new skate ramp...

As introverts, the husband and I are fairly quiet and subdued in public, particularly in group settings. It takes a lot for us to move out of our comfort zone. In all honesty, we do just prefer being at home. Or at least in an environment where we feel comfortable.

So we like having people over to hang out. We love cooking and creating delicious food for our friends. Sharing some wine and good times together. I think it's probably our way of showing our appreciation for those around us who have had an impact on our lives.

And then we go back into our shells for a little while to recharge ;)

One hyped up child, free to good home...

Beach, birthday parties and family dinners.

At least one over-tired, grumpy and irritated child hanging around.

Also comes with a 9 year old attitude.

He's toilet trained and can make himself breakfast.

Be warned, he is also teaching himself to write Ancient Greek....

Footy, beach time and traffic jams

We got to catch up with friends this afternoon on the Gold Coast. My kids love their kids and they all had a great time.

I thought the water was getting a little on the cool side ;)

All this after the boy's rather active footy game this morning.

And what was meant to be about an hour's drive to the coast turning into almost two hours stuck in traffic with kids going completely crazy in the back.

We were almost at our destination otherwise I'm fairly certain the husband would have put the car into 4wd and jumped the medium strip to do a U-turn and head back home just to get them to stop picking at, poking, looking, touching, talking, breathing on etc each other.

I wonder if we could put a seat on the roof racks.

I'll sit up there...

It's a marathon, not a sprint....

Isn't that what they all say??

"It's a marathon... take your time. It's not a sprint to the finish line"

Yeah, well... I'd prefer not to be in a race of any kind, so let me change that for you.

It's not a race, it's a journey. Of discovery. Of learning. Of living.

Slow, steady & sustainable.

And if you want to walk, just walk.

I'll make my cake and I'll eat it too

There's nothing wrong with having the occasional piece of cake. Even one made with *gasp* white sugar and flour (ok, in my case, it was a gluten-free and dairy-free cake mix... I had to make two so I cheated lol).

The key word in that is occasional.

You know, like, every now and then. For birthdays, special occasions and whatnot.

Besides, cake is delicious.

I like things that are delicious.

Happy Birthday little dude

Today my boy is 9yo.

He's a cute, intelligent and sometimes challenging young man.

But I love him.

Daddy made him a skate ramp for the driveway, he got a new cricket bat and a stack of books on Marine Biology as requested.

My parents also provided a Captain Underpants book and the Treehouse activity book.

Cupcakes after his cross country training (he is on the school team!!) and then a yummy dinner and cake tonight with family :)

Hanging out at The Gabba

Picked the boy child up early from school today so he could go see a partial training session of the Brisbane Lions at the Gabba. After which, he and a couple of hundred other under-9 footy kids were presented with 2016 Lions jerseys as part of their AFL Qld registration.

There's so much opportunity for kids these days... but I'm not sure they quite realise it...

It was a little sad at the end though as they were handing out Four n Twenty mini pies to the kids... my little Coeliac kid had to walk past all these kids munching on really yummy smelling pies and he was starving as he had devoured everything in the lunchbox I packed waaaay too quickly.

Breathe dammit. Just breathe.

Hello Monday. You started off so well but you're starting to slide downhill somewhat.

Still lots to do, some can be done now, others will have to wait until tomorrow.

I have cakes to make, dinners to sort out, a beach trip to plan, all mixed in with the usual day-to-day stuff and work.

Yes, I over-think things. But seriously, if I didn't, we would have nothing to eat and nothing clean to wear and nothing fun to do.

So I'm over here breathing and trying to act all zen-like while my brain is rushing about at 100km per hour.

Breathe dammit.

It'll all turn out in the end.

Mount Washmore is gone...

Finally.

I don't even want to think about how many loads I folded and put away today.

But I just walked past the laundry and there's at least another load's worth of clothes sitting in the basket already.

I think it's multiplying...

AFL season is upon us

This is my son's fourth year playing AFL (Aussie Rules football for the uninitiated lol). He started out in AusKick and played under6's that season and he's been there ever since.

He loves it. It's the one thing that he rarely ever complains about. Even after a full day at school he looks forward to training on Thursday evenings, and this morning he was eager for the first game of the season.

We are totally blessed to have had the same awesome coach and the same core group of kids all the way through. He's made some really good mates and learned a lot of great skills that he can use on and off the field.

So I'll continue to take him every Thursday and every Saturday there is a game until he doesn't want to play any more. Which by the looks of it won't be any time soon as he's already counting down the time until he can play for the school team (next year I think!).

Wow. Unexpected.

I wasn't expecting my little brain burst from yesterday to get shared over 20 times and get over 23,000 views!

It was just a little cathartic stress-release, trying to get the thoughts out of my head and somewhat clearly down on paper (or the screen in this case).

Very weird to have actual people reading my words on Facebook ;)

But today I spent the morning at the school cross country/Fun Run. I spent most of it standing, jumping and enjoying embarrassing multiple children I knew well by loudly cheering their name as they ran past :)

My boy came 3rd in his age group over a 1.5km circuit - he ran hard and was most pleased with his results.

My gorgeous girl, had to do 3km. She did the first lap and asked me to run the second with her, so I did. Walking, talking, and a little bit of running. And a whole lot of encouragement. I was particularly impressed with the kids from her grade that encouraged her every time they came past. Every one of them. Telling her she was doing awesome and to keep on going. And she did, and she finished.

So incredibly brilliant. I'm one proud mama.

I don't need fixing. I'm not broken.

Cheating today with a copy from my Facebook page...




It's been a struggle for me mentally this last week or so. Those that know me well know I am all about being ‪body positive and living life in a healthy and sustainable way - forming habits slowly over time and being kind to ourselves.

Well, no. I have not been kind to myself. Not lately anyway.

When I see or hear people talking about their latest diet, their aims to lose weight, flatten their tummy, slim their thighs, get rid of cellulite or stretch marks, after a while sometimes I question whether I need to do that too.

The answer, of course, is no, I don't. My body isn't perfect, but it doesn't need fixing. I'm an almost 37 year old mother of two with so many stories shown in the marks and scars on my body. I'm no longer an underweight Uni student or that overweight new Mum who yoyo-ed back and forth.

I'm the strongest I have ever been. I am the healthiest I have ever been (and I have the test results to prove it), but still I struggle. In a world where image is everything, it's easy to feel like you don't fit, that you're not quite up to scratch, that you're not enough.

Do I workout enough or too much? Do I spend enough time with my family, or too much? Am I selfless or selfish? And which one is better?

We are our own worst enemies. But society at large and the social media imagery that leaks into every corner of our lives doesn't help.

I am now in the healthy weight range for my height. But I have a little rounded tummy covered in tiger stripes that jiggles a little. Why? Because that's what my body at 37yo looks like after everything it's been through. And that's okay. It's normal for my body.

It doesn't need fixing. It isn't broken.

Do I think it's beautiful? Not yet. That's something I'm working on. It's a work in progress. Slow and steady, little by little, I'll chip away until I get there. I have 37 years of 'stuff' to wade through first.

Make it sustainable

I've been meeting with a friend one afternoon a week after school during term time almost every week for about the last two years. We started out just walking around the primary school while our kids were at band practice, did homework or just played together (special mention to a friend's older boy who has taken on an impromptu mentor role for our boys - they adore him).

It started out with an idea that our kids wouldn't let us quit because they would want their socialisation time... but it's now something we look forward to every week and really miss when we can't get there.

These days we walk or jog or sprint or run... we make the decision when we get there based on how our day went. Some days it's all we can do to walk the path, other days we need to sprint off some anger or frustration - I guess it's cheap therapy ;)

Today we did our first strength session with kettlebells.

Keeping it simple and just going with the flow. I am so insanely proud of my friend.

We recently moved over to the new high school campus and they have a proper sized oval. She jogged that entire length and powered up the stairs in addition to doing 2 sets of strength exercises using the kettlebells and bodyweight.

It was nothing strenuous - she's new to it, so we did the basics. Squat, hinge, push, pull, single-leg move (step ups), lunge and a basic core (mountain climbers).

I think she may have caught the strength bug.

And she may still talk to me, even if she can't walk properly tomorrow.

But we'll do it all again next week.

Yeah, it's only one day a week. But that's what is currently doable, so that's what we're doing. Slow, steady, and sustainable.

Meanwhile, that was my second session for the day. I don't know how pt's and group trainers do it. I'm freaking tired. So I'm going to bed.

It's hard to be body positive and inclusive when your body isn't included.

Just once I'd like to join in on the fun.

All these cute and cool t-shirts with body-positive sayings etc and I can't buy them because I'm too small.

No, I am not stick-thin. I am just small from top to toe. Which means that overall, my size is smaller than even the lowest average.

I buy clothes in the kids section... the age 10-12 years section.

So no, that size S (us4-6, au8-10) will not fit me. And I know I'm not supposed to complain.

I'm not a size 0... I'm a us2/au6-ish. And at 4'9/145cm, that's not thin, that's just slim. To add to the issues, I do actually have curves. I have a waist, I have hips, I have a butt, thighs & calves (hello squats and deadlifts), I have traps and I have rather muscular arms. Add in my tummy from 2 kids and c/sections and the fact I am closer to 40 than I'd prefer to acknowledge, and therein lies my issue.

Try and find me a kid's size that incorporates that.

Yes, I know all about thin privilege and I know I'm not supposed to complain. So I don't. I just go without. And live with clothes that don't quite fit right or try to adjust them as best I can. But my seamstress skills really do suck (yes, I have tried... apparently that gene deserted me somewhere along the line. I can crochet, but you can't really go out in public in nothing but a rainbow poncho).

But just once... just once, I'd like to be able to support some of these endeavours by purchasing apparel that suits me and my world views.

It's hard to be body positive and inclusive when your body isn't included.

Student Free Day

I think we are the only school in the city that has a student free day today.

An extra couple of kids added to my brood so we headed to the park with some other school families. It was actually pretty good because there was basically no-one else there (just some smaller kids) so they all got to play and hang out together and had a good time.

Now if they only had a coffee shop nearby....

Sunday Funday?

Excuse me while I laugh ;)

I cleaned the house.

I did make bibimbap for dinner though, that was yummy.

Now I have to clean the kitchen again....

Impromptu movie night

After spending a lot of the day sorting through the boy child's closet (and subsequently handing on a HUGE bag of clothes to a friend's son), the husband comes home and announces that we should go see Kung Fu Panda 3 at 6.15pm.

And so we did.

The kids laughed pretty much all the way through - it was a good movie :)

And it's pretty much straight to bed now. Because we're old lol

Forget about Friday

Just bring on the weekend.

Kids are home. That's a good thing.

Several orders and about 40 products to post. That's a good thing too.

Grocery day so we can have heaps of food? Yep, that's good.

All on the same day after I've had about 2 hours sleep and the kids are still in recovery mode after 2 weeks away from home?

Probably not such a good idea.

But we did survive.

Just.

No social media for 24 hours....

Well, I did it.
No checking social media for 24 hours.

Okay, except for the one work-related message, which doesn't count because it is work, and didn't go through the Facebook app, only messenger, and it was reply and send only (just being honest lol).

Oh hey, look! I even have an image for you. Do you know just how many notifications I had on that thing after 24 hours? Here's a hint, you can't actually look at them all, Facebook gives up after a while ;)

But the results?

I actually partially cheated because I knew that I was driving to pick up the kids today - 2 hours there and 2 hours back... that's at least 4 hours I wasn't going to be checking it anyway.

But I didn't even feel like checking it when I was waiting at Maccas for the kids and Mum to turn up. I did browse realestate.com.au (anyone that knows us knows that this is our hobby lol), but otherwise, I was all good.

I didn't even take any photos.

Not one.

I got home and checked my work emails and answered any messages I needed to, and... that was it. I tried browsing Facebook. I 'liked' a couple of posts, but I didn't actually want to be on there. I flicked through Instagram. And then turned it all off and got stuck into some work.

That was weird.

And the only time I got my phone out at footy training this evening was to check an email relevant to a conversation I was having and text my husband.

Going forward I have to try really hard to minimise my time spent on social media. I think by putting work duties first (scheduling posts etc) I should be able to manage it.

Did I also mention that during my social media free time yesterday I cleaned out four drawers and a box in my office? I can actually see my desk.

It was also a jolt to realise just how much time is wasted, and how very easy it is to lose track of that time when lost in the web of social media posts.

Oh, and just how many times I reach for the phone to "just check" on something.

That was a physical shock actually. You find your hands doing it almost autonomously.

I'm definitely going to set aside small amounts of time to clean up my Facebook groups and pages and keep weeding through my Instagram feed. Just little bits at a time should do the trick. There's a lot of nonsense to sort through.

All this spare time to actually get things done.

And maybe read a book or two.

Now there's a thought....

A 24 hour detox

No. Not one of those. I don't mean the cayenne pepper or lemon water nonsense.

I mean a 24 hour social media break.

I'm working my way through Inside Out by Anastasia Amour and this is today's exercise.

As my work is pretty much almost completely online, this could be a challenge - the temptation will be there to open up Facebook or quickly look at Instagram or Twitter.

But it's only 24 hours. I can do this.

Getting lonely

It's a bit too quiet without the kids around here.

No matter how much they drive me nuts when they are at home, I do love the little ratbags.

Feeling a bit off

Sometimes it gets that way.

Today was struggle-street, but I got some work done, so I think I'll count that as a positive.

It's kinda lonely around here about 4.30pm when there's no kids or husband floating around.

Eating veggies

The habit of the month at Healthy Habits Happy Moms is adding more veggies to your daily intake.

This is one thing I am actually pretty good at. We always had veggies to choose from when I was a kid, but they were generally basic. It's taken a while to get my husband to eat a variety of fruit & veggies though. I think when I first met him his veggie intake was contained to mashed potato or fies with peas & corn lol

My usual lunch is a small snack plate with a variety of veggies and some fruit, nuts and some kind of protein. I even added heaps of veggies to the spag bol we had for dinner tonight - carrot, onion, zucchini, celery and capsicum were the choices tonight.

I like to incorporate as many different types of veggies as possible - lots of variety and lots of colour.

First rule of foam rolling

Try not to swear.

Back in the gym yesterday after a week of sitting on my backside in a car for hours on end means having issues moving my legs today.

Oh well. The foam rolling will work, even if I want to smash it against the wall while I'm doing it.

Meanwhile, we bought the boy a birthday present today - one very awesome skateboard ramp. Secondhand and the husband is currently pimping it a little as it was a bit rough around the edges (very well loved).

That should keep him happy when he gets home :)

Impromptu lunch date

I headed into town for an impromptu lunch date with the husband. The only issue I have with these is they don't last long enough. And I sort of wanted to go shopping afterwards, but I also didn't. I knew I had to get home and do some work, so I guilted myself into coming home. That sucks, but I have gotten a fair chunk of work actually completed, so that's a good thing.

I got home and checked my emails and there was a message from my daughter with her English assignment research attached for my input. She's 3 hours away with my parents, but at least she is keeping her promise of about 30 minutes homework/assignment work every day after lunch.

Totally not ready for her to be sending me emails though.

I feel old.