If you know me, you know I'm lactose intolerant.
Think less the 'oh I read on a blog that milk is bad for you so I'm just gonna avoid it" and more "damn I want that cupcake with butter cream icing soooo bad... is it worth throwing up/crapping my pants/coming out in hives for".
I've been lactose intolerant before it was 'cool'. Does that make me a pre-emptive hipster... or just old?
My youngest is also lactose intolerant. He also has Coeliac Disease, but that's another story for another time.
But no, having to check labels or turn down desserts that look unbelievably good because you just can't afford to spend more time in the bathroom than necessary, is just plain no fun.
There's no "oh a little bit will be fine" or "pop a lactaid pill" here. No, it will not be fine, and did you know those pills don't work for everyone? They sort of did for a little while. And then they stopped. Spectacularly. That is something I do not want to relive ever.again.
And no, I am not "lucky" that I can't eat anything on a dessert menu. I want that double chocolate brownie with creamy ganache and a side helping of cream AND icecream dammit.
Don't get me started on the "oh I've given up dairy... it's soooo bad for you, no milk/icecream/yoghurt/butter here" while they are munching on a chocolate bar. That... I mean... seriously??
I can't even drink some WINE because I have to read the label on THAT too - I have an allergic reaction (think hives from top to toe) because some vineyards use milk as a refining agent (they can also sometimes use eggs and shellfish, but I'm ok with them). Thankfully labelling laws here make it a fairly painless task, but I can't just order a glass of wine at a restaurant.
If you don't have a medical reason, or an actual logical ethical reason (and NO a random blog post or highly over-hyped 'documentary' is not a good reason) why the hell remove a perfectly fine food group from your diet?
Signed the grumpy one who just wants to eat a Snickers without the fear of throwing up.
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